A gathering may include meals, conversation, travel, and activities in the same visit. Planning individual parts of the event can make requests clearer. Discuss the arrangements with the person who needs them and the host before the gathering where possible.
Choose options with the person who needs them. These are discussion ideas to adapt, not requirements to apply as a package.
Share information before the event
Ask about the venue, food-related activities, timing, and expected sounds. Advance information lets someone decide what they want to join and what arrangements to request. Avoid asking them to explain everything in front of the group.
Make seating and meal choices
Options include different seating, more distance from likely trigger sounds, a quieter eating area, or different meal timing. Offer non-food activities as another way to spend time together. Check the person’s preference rather than assuming that separate eating is always the right choice.
Agree how breaks will work
Identify a quiet space or somewhere to step outside, and agree a discreet signal if helpful. Clarify whether the person wants company or privacy. Leaving an activity and returning should not require a public discussion of their needs.
Adjust the length or format of a visit
A shorter visit, quieter venue, or remote participation may suit some situations. Discuss when the person expects to arrive or leave and how they would like to stay involved. If plans change, give notice when possible.
Choose one contact
With the person’s agreement, a trusted relative or friend can coordinate practical requests with the host. Share only what is needed. Afterward, ask privately which arrangements were useful and what should change for the next gathering.
Example request
“I would like to come for the afternoon. Could I sit at the end of the table and use the spare room for a break if needed? I would also enjoy joining the walk afterward.”
Planning checklist
- Ask about the venue, activities, and likely sounds.
- Agree seating and food-related arrangements.
- Identify a break space and return plan.
- Choose a contact who can help discreetly.
- Check afterward what the person wants next time.
Further resources
Explore IMF’s free resources or browse the provider directory.
About these options
These ideas draw on the family, friends, and social gatherings section of IMF’s Misophonia Accessibility Input Survey. They are starting points for discussion, not findings from survey responses or a tested treatment protocol. Availability and procedures vary between providers and settings.
